adventureswiththepooh

An honest take on life and parenthood

Give Me Your Unconditional Love

on October 1, 2013

One afternoon, when the Pooh was just two weeks old, I leaned over her bassinet to check on her as she woke up from a nap. She looked right at me, and smiled a huge toothless baby smile. And held it.

Being the insecure creature that I am, I immediately looked over my shoulder to see who she was smiling at. No one was there. (Somewhat embarrassing to admit, but true).

2011-07-28_08-42-21_904

I then sniffed her. Babies smile when they have gas, right?

No gas.

She continued to beam at me. I could hardly believe it.

She was smiling at me!

ME!

I decided to roll with it. I stood there, leaning over her bassinet, and smiled right back at her. I was so blissed out that my eyes brimmed with tears and I thought my face would break in half from smiling so hard. I soaked up all of that radiance that was pouring off of her and basked in it, every last drop.

And that, my friends, is when I felt unconditional love for the very first time.

All my life I had searched for it and came up short. I searched for it from family and friends and lovers, starving for it, convinced that I did not find it because I was lacking in some way. My life became a continual process of self-improvement, of achievement, of trying my damnedest to prove that I was worthy.

Then along came the Pooh.

From that moment when she smiled at me like a tiny sunshiny angel until now, I have been head over heels in love with her. And she with me.

She has seen me stressed and crabby in my pajamas, she has seen me dolled up for date night with her daddy. She has seen me sick and slow, she has seen zombie me at 3 am. She has seen me frantic when she has locked herself in the car, and dizzy with happiness when she covers me in kisses for no reason.

In spite of the ups and downs and demands of toddlerhood, I know she loves me no matter what. Even when I am hanging on to my sanity by a fingernail. Even when I can’t find my keys. Again.

It is the sweetness of that love from her, the miracle of it, that astounds me most. For the Pooh, I am enough. And I always have been.

***

And now, for a musical selection to bring it all home.

Sing it, Donna: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Qxyf0YTJmA

If you like extra cheese, check this one out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpLaDY1hlM8

Give me your unconditional love

The kind of love I deserve

The kind I want to return

 ***

Kisses, my sweet bear.

Love, Mommy

2013-04-25_15-57-00_77

Advertisements

3 responses to “Give Me Your Unconditional Love

  1. Yu, Maria says:

    This was beautiful! I needed this today . . .another day in paradise at SAP!

    =0

    How are you?

    Hope you are doing well!

    Like

  2. So precious!
    Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

    Like

  3. jgroeber says:

    Thanks for the sunshine! Always good to remember to look for those lovin’ gooby grins!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: